hope it's a good sunday...

so m. and i are just waiting for the seahawks game to start...we went to church, crossroads service at 11:00...it has been a long time since m. and i went to church together...great contemporary christian music, and the ageless message of God's sending Jesus to redeem our sins, basically...but mainly, just being there next to m. and praying that he has made that commitment to the Lord...i am so thankful for the time i am spending with m. today...i pray that God would continue to work on my relationship with k....

saw mom and dad before i took communion...they seem so glad to be in their new home...

it is chilly, but very sunny and beautiful out today...

i work at oms on monday and tuesday, then on wednesday my long term substitute position starts at mc....i will work there until about the 21st, then work a few days at kp until the Christmas break...

ok, i'm starting to feel ill, so i'd better go...later...

a blessed thanksgiving to all!

hope it is a special day for everyone out there in blogland...i am currently baking some cornbread to take when i go to my sister's house for the 2:00 dinner...i will first be going to the home of my ex-husband's parents for a 12:00 dinner...should be fun at both places...it's been a short and busy week...i worked at oms on monday, then was the librarian at rfe on tuesday and wednesday, as well as working at kp in the afternoons...did some errands yesterday, got my hair cut (more on that later, probably)...so just looking forward to spending some time with family and friends today...so much to be thankful for each day of our lives, right?...today i have been thinking about a third anniversary that rapidly approaches, and i think about the progress and growth that has come from that experience...i will elaborate more as december 6 gets closer...december 6, 2001 was a day in which i both lost everything and gained everything in life...some may read that and think, "what?"... some may read it and think, "sounds familiar"...

so wherever you are in the world, whoever you are and whatever you do, i wish for you a safe and special thanksgiving day, and that all of your days would be so...

until next time...

yeah...extreme makeover home edition is on tonight!

so...that new part of my blog title is a quote i found on someone's blog, and i liked it, so...here it is...it's very true, isn't it?...good will prevail, eventually...if we all could take after gandhi's example of peace, that would change the world, wouldn't it?...but not everyone is of the same mindset, so that won't happen...all i can do is do my best each day to build people up instead of breaking them down...i do try to do that...

by the way, i am totally confused as far as what week this is...um, i am a week ahead of schedule...obviously, world aids day is wednesday, december 1...duh...

there are many things in this world which sadden and confuse me...aids...alzheimers...mental illness...all are personally so sad to me, not just the devestation of the illnesses, but the stigma against them, especially aids and mental illness...get over it, people...ok, i am going to stop now, or this will turn into one of my pre-election rants...i just have a real problem with people who consider aids a "cure", and think that those with mental illness are somehow "weird" or "different"...don't get me started...oh, i already am started?...ok, somebody stop me...

tomorrow i work in that sort of challenging class, but i am ready for the challenge...bring it on!

i am still trying to finish harry potter and the goblet of fire...still need to see movies 2 and 3 of that series...movies that look interesting are: sideways (have heard excellent things about it) and return to neverland (with johnny depp)...maybe during christmas i will actually go to the theater (!) and see a movie (!)...

it has been possibly three months since i have viewed any of the lord of the rings movies...something is seriously wrong with me...i guess i needed a break, since i have seen each of them at least 10 times, and read each book, including the hobbit...

again i am distracting myself from a difficult world situation by discussing really unimportant mundane trivial subjects...i just can't focus on what is happening in the war and what is happening just everyday and i hear it on the news and i just can't go there right now...each day goes by and the skies are dark earlier and earlier...but i am not ruled by depression as in years past...sadness is now merely sadness, boredom is boredom, anger is anger...i no longer allow a diagnsis to take the blame for my choices, and it has been freeing...

this blog entry has been rather rambling, but hey, it says in my blog title that there may be rambling involved, so...you were warned!

ok, i am done...until next time...

another sunday morning (depending on where you live)

good sunday morning, or happy monday to any of you in those time zones...it's the week of thanksgiving, so a short work week, fortunately, but also unfortunately...as a substitute teacher who depends on working each school day, no school means no work which in turn means no income...those of you who read this blog {again, i have only heard from my one faithful follower in southern california :) }know that i have another job, but, alas, it is closed both thursday and friday this week...so...that 4 day weekend that i used to anticipate is now the 4 day weekend to dread...have no fear, though...my complaining stops now...i will look upon this 4 days as a positive...
where has my creativity gone?...seems my last few blogs have lacked the interesting element...writer's block?...sure, why not?...oh, i helped mom and dad move into their beautiful new home in west richland yesterday...they will move in officially on tuesday...m. and i will go to church at 930 am, then i think we'll watch the seahawk game and whatever, then he will go to kennewick for the week...it will be a busy week, lots going on...tuesday k. is going to get her driver's license, i have to work so i hope her grandpa will take her...wednesday night i will go to the world aids day service...i have missed the last couple of years, so i am glad to be going back...m.'s group is performing at a world aids day service at cbc...there is a concert that i will miss that night...m. said something about a concert on thursday, but since that is thanksgiving, i don't know...that would be cool, though...it's not like holidays are off-limits, we did go down to that louise rose clinic on veterans day...i'll go to my sister's, then probably to l.'s parents home on thursday...i just remembered last year when i was working 3 jobs, 7 days a week, and i was working at bon macy's the day after thanksgiving...never again!!!!!!!!...i do not like working retail and dealing with money...put me in a classroom with 100 kids, i can take it....no more retail!

by the way, the washington governor race is still too close to call!...they are re-counting...may not know until into december just who will lead this great state of washington...my brother mi. said yesterday that gregoire should be westside gov and rossi should be eastside gov...hmmmmm....interesting...there are vast differences on each side of our state, politically, geographically, culturally, demographically, etc...but we are one state and need one gov...so we'll see what happens..

finally friday...

obviously it has been a busy week, since i haven't written since last saturday...i am too tired to write tonight...does that sound familiar?...hopefully i will have time to write tomorrow...

saturday the 13th

okay, so what has been happening?...well, this is the first chance i have had in the past couple of days to write, so...today mom and dad came over and dad looked at my car...he said he is going to pick it up monday and get it winterized...thanks, dad...he also replaced the headlight on the white car...i am thankful for his help...but would like to not have to depend on him...we (mom, dad, m. and i) went to sterlings and had a great time laughing about lots of funny stuff...then we drove to their new house, which they will move into shortly...it's great...

i saw k. and ko. and others at safeway the other night...

what's happening in the world...well, when i have more time, i will write about our really awesome day at mt. hood for the louise rose jazz clinic...

so scott peterson was found guilty...may laci and her son rest in peace...may the families and friends of laci and scott be able to have some kind of peace and closure someday...i don't know whether life in prison or death by lethal injection would be better justice...all i know is that these past two years must be hell on earth for those families and friends...that is one of those things i don't understand about life...how do you handle something like that?...how do you live each day without that just taking over and either causing you to go numb, be angry at anyone and everyone, "check out" of life, blame God...i don't know...it's like any family who has had to experience the cruelty of a murder or abduction of a loved one...that would be the worst thing...

this is getting too emotional, so i will switch gears, or maybe just end this and continue it later...i drank about 5 cups of coffee at sterling's, so i am wired...m. and i are going to go find the church where he is attending tomorrow's funeral...

so hopefully i will write more later...

by the way, i darkened my hair to a kind of ash blonde color...it looks good now, but i have had to shampoo it about 20 times in the past couple of days because i left the color on too long...for a couple of days, it was way too dark and looked rather scary...now it is looking much better...i just got tired of the fake blonde look...but i think i need more highlights...could i get more trivial?

another day has come and almost gone...

well, it was a good day...very busy...i taught at o. middle school, then came home and changed and got my stuff ready for work tomorrow, then went to kp...tomorrow i will work then go to k.'s conference, then work, then i guess i will do laundry over at k's...then thursday i have to be at hhs by 545 am to go to mt. hood!!!...hey, m. will be home wednesday night!...i am so excited to see him and hear about the tour...
later...

thanks God!!!!!

i had just written a short and depressing blog entry about how i missed my kids, and was still on msn messenger trying unsuccessfully to contact k. when all of a sudden m. signed on from boise!!!!!...we talked on msn for a few minutes!!!!...it was so great, just exactly what i needed tonight...thank you God for always knowing my needs, and i apologize for only thanking You when i figure it out (which i am sure is almost never)...i feel uplifted...i'm not saying that my moods or my temperament is determined by my relationship at any moment with m. and k., but it does somewhat affect it, especially since the divorce and what that has caused...so thanks again, God, for giving me that chance to have some contact with m. when he is about 7 hours away and in another time zone, for that matter!!!!...ok, now i really am going to bed...does anyone really believe that?...

too tired to sleep...wait, didn't i already use that title?

words can't express what is happening...nothing major, really, but at the same time, the simplest parts of life can be the most troubling, can't they?...i miss both of my kids tonight, for two entirely different reasons...and i won't go into either now...i will now try to go and sleep...if i don't stop writing now, i will write for hours, so i will say good night...

i was going to write, but i changed my mind...

i have been down today, not anything too bad, just missing m. and hoping he is having a great time...my back is hurting more than usual...just a slight headache...actually i have had one since wednesday, although not nearly as serious...i talked to k. on msn messenger...she sounded good...i just can't write now...later

good sunday morning to all...

so i will help m. get packed and ready to go today...then i guess i will do some cleaning and organizing around here...i should go back and read my old blog entries about how many times i planned to "clean and organize"...most of the times, sadly, i am sure that is exactly what i did...it looks like i won't go to church today...i have to pray for forgiveness for being what i think was irresponsible during my past illness...there are some people to whom i did not show the consideration they deserved, even though i was ill and wasn't really thinking clearly...i am not quite sure how to handle this situation...i guess my prayer right now would be that God would put in my heart what i need to do, because right now i don't know what that is, or maybe i do and am reluctant to do it...
yesterday sure was a fun day...i think that slowly the balance will be restored to my life...something else i have to consider is being prepared for something major happening in my life...(music interruption: desperado by the eagles is on the radio- good song!)...you know, i can't really get into that subject right now...it is almost constantly on my mind, but somehow writing about it is difficult...this may be what the students hear when i talk about problem solving in math, you know, how they are to put what they are thinking on paper in words, pictures, and numbers (palabras, dibujos, y numeros en espanol!)...wasl, or washington assessment of student learning has been helpful in that way...what was i talking about?...
ok, i'm done...

fun night...

yeah, we just got back from taking t. home, after cramming 10 people into 5-person table at shari's after the byron gjerde mass choir at phs tonight...it was fun, most of the usual suspects were there, and of course, c. proceeded to deposit crackers all around the table, although most of us were hiding behind napkins and menus at the time...sounds like juvenile antics, but there were 4 teachers in the group, including me....it was really fun...anyway, so m. leaves tomorrow for their idaho tour, then thursday we have to be at hhs by 545 am to get ready to go to mt. hood...should be way fun...we had a good day...i still have a headache, though nothing compared to wed, thurs, and some of fri...good night...

things about me that you may or may not care to know...

TEN Random Things About Me
10) I am obsessed with maps.
9) I love to make charts, graphs, lists, etc.
8) I could read all day and night and never tire of it.
7) I have an extremely warped sense of humor.
6) My shoe size is a 5 or 6, depending on the shoes.
5) I buy my clothes mostly at Thrift-Rak, which is a very cool local secondhand store.
4) I am a substitute teacher who teaches elementary, middle, and high school in 3 different school districts.
3) I am currently teaching myself the Russian language.
2) I was married for over 20 years.
1) I think baseball is more than just a sport...

NINE Places I've Been
9) EUROPE! Traveling about Spain, France, Switzerland, Austria, Hungary, Germany, and Italy on my 1980 European vacation...went to Dachau, the concentration camp near Munich, Germany- unbelievably sad...
8) NEW YORK! I've been there twice, 1976 for the bicentennial, and in 1980 on our way to Europe...went to New York City during a garbage strike and a Broadway strike (so we didn't get to see the Broadway play Oklahoma!)...saw the setting-up for the Olympic Games when they were to be in Lake Placid...saw Mom's birthplace of Little Falls...
7) ARIZONA! My first trip as a married person took place in 1983 when we drove to Phoenix...it was romantic...
6) UTAH! Have only been in the Salt Lake Airport...spectacular mountain view
5) NEVADA! Reno International Jazz Festival in 1979...Lake Tahoe
4) CALIFORNIA! Disneyland twice (1973 and 1992)...on an Amtrak train down the Pacific Coast to watch the sunset- gorgeous!...the Monterrey area is beautiful...San Francisco is on my list of most special places in the world...Susanville is where our bus driver got a speeding ticket on a high school trip to Reno...
3) OREGON! Walking along the shores of the romantic Oregon coast with my high school boyfriend Alan in 1979...Applauding my son's jazz choir performance at the Mt. Hood Jazz Festival in Gresham, Oregon in 2004...
2) IDAHO! Silverwood, amusement park extraordinaire and home of the Tremors roller coaster...Coeur d'Alene, a lovely town...the capital city of Boise, where my son was in the All-Northwest Choir earlier this year...Lewiston, where I have watched many a soccer game...
1) 2 WASHINGTONS HERE: WASHINGTON DC! Visited here on the Bicentennial trip of 1976...Horrible storm prevented us from seeing the White House...in 1980 saw streakers at the Capitol Mall...Smithsonian Institute, the Subway, Watergate Hotel, Washington Monument and Lincoln Memorial- so much history!!! and last but never least- WASHINGTON STATE! I live in Washington, so I have been to many places within this beautiful place, such as...`Seattle and Spokane, but everyone knows about those places, so I will mention some not-so-well-known, but special-to-me places...most of all the San Juan Islands for whale-watching and just riding the ferries between the islands...also Mt. Rainier...my hometown(s) of the Tri-Cities, Pasco, Kennewick, and Richland in southeastern Washington...Richland, my current hometown and birthplace of my son and daughter...Richland is home to the Hanford Nuclear Reservation and Washington State University Tri-Cities campus (where I obtained my Bachelor's Degree)...Kennewick is home of the Three Rivers Coliseum, where the WHL Tri-City Americans play hockey...Pasco is my birthplace and home to the Northwest League Tri-City Dust Devils baseball team..Ellensburg is a pretty area, home of Central Washington University...Walla Walla is quaint...Tyler, Washington is a tiny ghost-type town on the way to Cheney and it is very scary at night!...Cheney has nice people working at the Zip's restaurant...Boulder Cave is a fun place...

EIGHT Things I Want to Do Before I Die
8) Learn to play the guitar
7) Earn my National Board Certification in Education
6) Make amends to those I have hurt in life
5) Hang gliding
4) Learn to rollerskate, then to rollerblade
3) Possibly marry again (this time to the right person!)
2) Become a spokesperson for cancer research and/or mental illness research
1) Be at peace with my Creator

SEVEN Ways to Win My Heart
7) Speak the truth in love
6) Laugh with me, not at me
5) Live life every day
4) Make it count
3) Discuss instead of argue
2) Non-judgemental
1) Love God, others, and self

SIX Things I believe In
6) God. I don't always understand His ways, but I know He loves me even though I am not worthy
5) Friendship
4) Truth
3) Responsibility
2) Love
1) The Seattle Mariners will have a better season in 2005.

FIVE Things I'm Afraid Of
5) Senseless violence (sounds like an oxymoron, but some violence is necessary)
4) Rocks hitting my windshield as I am driving
3) The sound of a car backfiring
2) Heights, but roller coasters may help me overcome this
1) Alzheimer's disease

FOUR of My Favorite Items in My Bedroom
4) My cat Tigger snuggled next to me at night
3) My beautiful "Washington Star" quilt that I won in a raffle a few years ago.
2) "Grandma's pillow", which Grandma Doreen made for me as a child.
1) The white bookcase that my daughter and I painted together.

THREE Things I Do Everyday
3) Talk to God about every little and big thing going on.
2) Be thankful for what I have and do not have.
1) Make mistakes.

TWO Things I'm Trying Not to Do Right Now
2) Feel sorry for myself and my situation.
1) Eat when I am not hungry.

ONE Person I Want to See Right Now
1) Hmmm......

FYI: found this on someone's blog while i was "blog-hopping" the other day, so i just copied and pasted my own information and voila!...so feel free to do the same if you wish...

i'm back!...sort of...

so this is the first time since wednesday that i have even been on the computer...wednesday morning i got a terrible tension headache that was so bad, i slept almost constantly wednesday and thursday...missed three days of work, although i did go to my afternoon job last night, and did not do much...will give more details about exactly what happened later...needless to say, anyone who has read my blog in the past (and that seems to be only one person, and they know who they are :) ) knows that i don't have a balanced life, as far as taking care of myself with proper nutrition and fitness and relaxation to go along with work...so...i take this setback recently as a call to change...God is giving me a "wake up call" or something...and since this (balanced life) was my way of life so recently, i know how to do this so that it doesn't take any effort, it is just part of my day...
so the presidential election has come and gone...i am proud of the good voter turnout throughout most of the nation...the race for washington state governor is still too close to call...it's been very exciting, so we'll see what happens...www.vote.wa.gov/general is a website with lots of good info on this...
today m. and i will go to the mall so he can buy shoes for his upcoming jazz choir tour in idaho...we'll probably buy at payless shoes...then the mass choir thing is at phs, so we'll go...i thought about not attending due to having been ill and missing work, but this is part of my new "balance in life"...so i will get out and live life, instead of staying home all of the time...it's time...
thursday, veterans day, we will be traveling down to mt. hood community college in gresham oregon, for a cool jazz clinic conducted by louise rose...i have heard incredible things about her as a singer, a inspiration, a motivator, i am excited to see her...
until later...oh, by the way, talked to k. the other night and she sounds pretty good...i do pray for her and m. and also for my co-workers at kp, some are going through difficult times...